alright, its no secret that my friend has family issues. her sister is crazy and destructive and takes advantage of everyhting. she gets away with whatever she wants and thinks shes in charge. I seriously could go on about this girl forever and about how she destroys her sisters stuff and gets away with it all the time. she talks back to her sister cusses at her family and picks fights with them. my parents are appalled with the things she gets away with and dont understand why her family doesnt discipline her. And of course this makes my friend A feel terrible. like her parents love her sister more and dont care about A or something. the younger sister somehow always has better technology than her (that she receives from her parents). shes getting a laptop for christmas despite the fact that shes horribly behaved to the point that everyone is led to think that shes emotionally ill or something and As the one whos going to college next year and actually needs one. A's dad used to hit her, but truthfully hes not her real dad. A was born when her mother wasn 18 and never met her real father. but the man who plays her dad now used to be very aggressive before he left for a while and came back a devout christian. seriously, every time i get in the car with A and him hes listening to some guy preach on the radio. im not kiding, every single time. but somethigns still not right. he broke the younger sisters phone today by repeatedly smashing it because he was angry and almost broke her ipod touch. rather than confronting the younger sisters problems it seems the parents are trying to fix their family by trying to make them spend more time together. they were making them do homework together and A was writing a paper and having trouble concentrating with her siblings there so she started listening to her ipod to drone them out. then her father freaked out and took her ipod, telling her she was being anti-social. no one here listens to A and shes not treated fairly. and shes turned to drinking and smoking to try and relieve the stress. she says shes going to go crazy. she says smoking doesnt do anything for her. Id rather she didnt do either but i dont know what i can do. i think shes sending me "calls for help" if you know what i mean. she sends me pictures of lit cigarettes and texts that say things like "im tired and covered in alcohol". the texts are playful of course, shes trying to get a reaction out of me. maybe she wants to know someone cares, but idk. she told me today that she drives without a seatbelt on because she likes the thought of getting in a car accident and flying through the windsheild. shes convinced she'd survive because her aunt and dad were in a similar accident. she says she wants her family to care about her and that she wouldnt purposefully get in an accident but if she did she wouldnt care. i'm being the best friend i can. i listen to her problems and try to comfort her... but theres gotta be something else i can do right? thats what this site is here for! somebody help me! ((( she also cut herself a few years back when her mom had a.. what would u call it.. pot relapse? and i think thats about the time her dad left. college isnt coming fast enough, A needs help now.
(i hope i covered everything)

I would go to a guidance counselor IMMEDIATELY and get her help. She needs psychiatric help. She's having suicidal thoughts and destructive actions. You can listen to her all you want and she can rant and rave until she's blue in the face, but in the end she NEEDS help, and you can't give her that unless you tell an adult.

i think u might be right.. its easy to forget the problems sometimes because shes happy in school. itll be hard though, bcs shes had a psychiatrist before, and she said it was a waste. i dont think shell want to go back at all

Wow..that's quite a bit going on...I hope everything works out ok. In reguards to suicide...do you think your friend is suicidial, I know they said that they don't wear their seatbelt or whatever, but do you really believe that they want to kill themself? I was just wondering because i've had alot happen in my life, and though you sometimes want people to express remorse over you that doesnt always mean that you want to kill yourself. I think youre right about her wanting to feel loved with the text messaging, sometimes people just need someone to be there ya know? I think you should definately keep talking with her and try to see if you can help her come out of what she's going through, if it gets completely out of control I think you know what you should do.

i don't think she just needs a psychiatrist.
i think she needs to be put into a psych ward and get 24/7 help.

i dont think she wants to kill herself... but idk. have you ever had a time when life just wasnt treating you well and you thought, if i died right now i wouldnt mind? i think maybe thats how she feels. i just wish there was something else i could do to help her. if things get worse i guess ill have to tell someone, but id feel like i was betraying her a little.

I recommend she talks to someone. As much as you want to be there for her, or as much as she might be driving you crazy with her antics, only a doctor can determine if she needs medication or special advice from an outsiders perspective. Obviously this has all been going on for a while. Just show your support, but take care of yourself. She is worrying you. As much as you want to listen to her, make sure she doesn't step over the line between talking and confessing a serious issue thats above your head.
Be a good friend and get her help. But be good to yourself, and recognize you might not be able to provide 100% comfort, but that you tried.

i have never felt like that. i think she's asking for attention, and she's seriously thinking about it.

it'd be better that you "betray" her than something bad happen and you regret not telling someone who can help her.

Dance Hall Drug...in reguards to the psych ward...because someone is in a state of helplessness doesnt necessarily mean that they need to go in a psych ward...Im not discrediting your opinion at all, and i definately agree that she needs help, but i dont know that having her checked into some mental hospitol is the best solution. I understand that Luv2Dayx3 is really concerned for her friend and that she wants to do whats best for her, but i honestly dont think that her friend is crazy, I think that she just has alot of deep emotional wounds that need to be addressed. Even though I don't personally know these people, and can only guess on the situation, i think that A and her family really need to sit down and address the issues. Family counseling can also be really effective because that way everyone gets a say and is able to have a voice. I think that A has had alot going on for a long time and now all of her repressed issues are beginning to come out and i think that's why she is in such a terrible state right now. Good luck and I hope everything works out for your friend :[

it is never a betrayal to try to save another person's life. and i can tell you from experience that i have had to 'go to a higher' authority to save a friend more than once, and sometimes it does actually cost you the friendship in the short term (which can even last a few years). but every time, over time, the person has been able to look back and see that my only motivation was loving them and wanting to help.

but before going for help, it is def cool to tell the person that you plan to do so, and why.

in the meantime, though, give the person love, and simply affirm to her how much you love her, and what a special and important person she is. letting someone know that 'they matter' is often the best gift we can give another person, especially someone who is not getting that love from her parents as much as she needs.